So… let’s get down to business, shall we? Because believe it or not, I’m sticking to my promise and you’re getting a post every day this week, whether you like it or not!
F for February 2013 also stood for F as in Fashion Weeks, be it New York, Milan, London or Paris. And this “Fashion Month” brought along, with its usual hustle and bustle and streetstyle and models and weird outfits and the coolest atmosphere, the… Big. New. Trends. For. AW. 13-14.
… It tends to freak me out, how future-oriented the fashion world always is – shouldn’t we be living in the moment? Carpe Diem and all that stuff? Anyway, I’ll write about that some other time.
So this month basically showed us what we’ll be craving for in a year’s time. And trust me, the madness of it all… You have to see it in order to believe it.
As promised, I’m going to start by analyzing the trends I (and you, I’m pretty sure) will NOT be trying out come September. These trends are as seen on Vogue.fr, so no, I’m not making any of them up. I would also like to point out, for the record, that I deeply and truly respect all fashion designers everywhere, and I mean no harm. But this is just too funny. Seriously, what were they thinking?
Exhibit A, “Exotic Furs” by : Roberto Cavalli, a.k.a. Night of The Living Dead meets BigFoot; Fendi, a.k.a. I may be Punk but I’m allowed to get cold (and I’m just after pouring paint all over myself for the hell of it); Versace, a.k.a. Am I a bee? Am I a zebra? Am I a giraffe? I’m yellow with stripes and patches, what the HELL am I? (Starting to sound a lot like a bad guessing game.)
Exhibit B, “Night Owl” by: Dries Van Noten (whom I love btw), a.k.a. I am the only person who knows how to use feathers naturally in a ready-to-wear show; Gucci, a.k.a. I look like a mermaid, I’m sharing my breasts with the world and I’m dragging my peacock-like wave of feathers behind me, but I’m off to pick up the kids from school OF COURSE; Vivienne Westwood, a.k.a. I’m like a bird, I only fly away…
Exhibit C, “Metallic Mesh” by: Paco Rabanne, a.k.a. Look at me I’m a Disco Ball, Ooooooooh… SHINY.
Thankfully, no need to worry your fashionable little heads: some trends for AW 13-14 are totally wearable, simple yet stylish, and truly beautiful. I’ll be giving you the good news tomorrow, so while you’re waiting for it, just scroll back up through these perfect examples of god-forsaken Fashion Madness, and just… ROTFLOL (Roll On The Floor Laughing Out Loud).